Footy's back, lads! Premier League 2025/26 fixtures: Every bleedin' match for all 20 teams!

Footy's back, lads! Premier League 2025/26 fixtures: Every bleedin' match for all 20 teams!

Written by Raging Rob on June 18, 2025 at 8:17 AM

The Premier League fixture list for the 2025/26 season has finally been released, and it's about bloody time too. I've been waiting for this moment like a kid waiting for Christmas, except instead of presents, I'm getting football. FOOTBALL!

August 2025

Matchweek 1 and we've already got some cracking fixtures lined up. Liverpool hosting Bournemouth on a Friday night? Lovely stuff. But the real bellend of the bunch is Manchester United hosting Arsenal at Old Trafford. Can't wait to see those muppets arguing over who's got the bigger ego. Oh, and let's not forget the newly-promoted sides - they're in for a proper spanking, aren't they?

Matchweek 2 is where things start getting interesting. We've got Newcastle taking on Liverpool, which should be a proper scrap. And then there's the London derby between West Ham and Chelsea. I can already hear the "banter" between the fans. It's like listening to a bunch of five-year-olds arguing over who's got the best toy car.

Matchweek 3 is where the big boys come out to play. Liverpool vs Arsenal and Manchester United vs Burnley? Yes, please! And don't even get me started on Tottenham vs Bournemouth. That's going to be a right old ding-dong battle, that is.

September 2025

Matchweek 4 sees Manchester City facing off against Manchester United. It's like a family reunion, except everyone hates each other and wants to beat the living daylights out of each other. Lovely stuff!

In Matchweek 5, we've got Liverpool vs Everton. The Merseyside derby is always a feisty one, and I can't wait to see the Everton lads getting their knickers in a twist over a dodgy refereeing decision. Never change, Everton, never change.

Matchweek 6 has got Tottenham vs Wolverhampton, which should be a cracker. But let's be honest, we're all going to be watching Chelsea vs Brighton, aren't we? Two teams full of prima donnas who think they're better than everyone else. It's going to be a right old laugh.

October 2025

Oh, look, it's Matchweek 7 and Arsenal are playing West Ham. Can't wait to see the Arsenal fans moaning about how unfair life is and how everyone is out to get them. Grow up, you muppets!

Matchweek 8 has got Liverpool vs Manchester United. It's like a soap opera, this one. I can't wait to see the drama unfold. Will there be tears? Will there be tantrums? Will there be a punch-up in the tunnel? I hope so!

And finally, we've got Matchweek 9. Arsenal vs Crystal Palace and Everton vs Tottenham are the standout fixtures here, but let's be honest, we're all going to be watching Chelsea vs Sunderland, aren't we? Two teams with more money than sense. It's going to be a right old knees-up.

And that's just the first three months of the season! I can't wait to see what the rest of the season has in store for us. It's going to be a right old rollercoaster, and I'm here for it. FOOTBALL IS LIFE, and if you don't like it, you can bloody well do one!

Raging Rob
Raging Rob
Rob is a passionate football fan who loves to share his opinions on the latest news and results. He has a short temper and is known for his rants on the beautiful game.