Listen up, you muppets! That soft twat Woody Johnson is buying up shares in Crystal Palace from that mug John Textor. Fucking hell, another Yank sticking his nose into the beautiful game!
Football's gone to the dogs
This deal for Textor's 43% stake is worth over £171 million, pending approval from those bellends at the Premier League. UEFA better hurry up and ratify Palace's Europa League spot, those FA Cup winners deserve it, unlike those French twats Lyon that Textor also owns.
Jetting into football
Johnson, worth £2.4 billion, tried to buy Chelsea in 2022 for £2 billion but chickened out. He's been playing with his Johnson too much, owning the shite New York Jets since 2000 with his brother. 25 years later, they're worth £5.1 billion, but still haven't won a fucking Super Bowl!
Yanks taking over
This dickhead was even the US ambassador to the UK, appointed by that orange buffoon Trump. Now he has to pass the Premier League's bullshit test before he can get his grubby mitts on Palace. At least he'll only have a quarter of the voting rights, same as that other Yank Textor had.
Mate, I'm sick of these Americans coming over here and ruining our sport. First the Glazers, then FSG, now this mug Johnson. Football's going down the shitter with these greedy cunts in charge. Someone needs to give them a proper kicking and take back control of OUR game!
