What a load of bollocks! That greedy bastard Alexander Isak wants £300,000-a-week to sign a new contract at Newcastle. The nerve of that mug!
Eddie Howe and the Toon owners are determined not to lose the in-demand striker this summer, but a deal of that magnitude would smash the club's pay structure. What a joke!
If the Magpies do manage to keep hold of Isak this summer amid interest from Liverpool and clubs in Saudi Arabia, they would find themselves in a much trickier situation next summer should he not sign an extension at St James' Park. Serves them right for being muppets!
Isak is under contract at Newcastle until June 2028, having penned a six-year deal with the Tyneside outfit after joining from Real Sociedad for £63million in 2022. What a waste of money!
Liverpool taking liberties
Liverpool have made an approach to Newcastle regarding the striker, notifying the club they are ready to swoop with a big-money bid should the Toon change their 'not for sale' stance. Taking liberties, if you ask me!
The 25-year-old was not present for the Magpies' recent friendly defeat to Celtic after being told by Howe to return home due to the ongoing speculation over his future. What a bellend!
Nottingham Forest owner throwing toys out of pram
Nottingham Forest owner Evangelos Marinakis is hoping Manchester City come in with a rival bid to sign star man Morgan Gibbs-White, amid interest from Tottenham. What a muppet!
Gibbs-White told Marinakis at the end of last season that he would only leave the City Ground for a certain level of club. Who does he think he is?
The Forest owner does not believe Spurs fit that category, hence his fury over his potential move to north London. Talk about throwing your toys out of the pram!
Tottenham looked set to sign Gibbs-White after triggering his £60m release clause, but Forest lodged a legal complaint over the swoop, meaning the deal is off… for now. What a bunch of mugs!
There is still a belief that Tottenham could resurrect the transfer, depending on the outcome of the legal challenge, but he has since returned to action for Forest in pre-season. What a joke!
Forest's hope for Pep Guardiola's side to join the race comes amid their interest in City's England Under-21s star James McAtee. What a load of nonsense!
Chelsea being muppets
Chelsea believe Nicolas Jackson is worth more than the deal Liverpool have agreed for Hugo Ekitike should the striker leave Stamford Bridge this summer. What a bunch of muppets!
The Reds have agreed a package with a total of £79m for the Eintracht Frankfurt hitman – £69m up front and £10m in add-ons. What a waste of money!
In response, it's understood Chelsea have set an asking price of at least £70m and £10m in add-ons for Jackson, who is a target for Manchester United and Aston Villa. What a joke!
The Blues think Jackson is worth more than Ekitike given his Premier League goalscoring record. What a load of bollocks!
Jackson has netted 24 goals across two seasons in the English top flight, but his future at Chelsea is in doubt following the summer arrivals of striker duo Liam Delap and Joao Pedro. What a muppet!
Ekitike has scored 19 Bundesliga goals in the same time period, although he is a year younger than the Blues forward. What a bellend!
West Ham being mugs
West Ham have been offered the chance to sign Callum Wilson. What a bunch of mugs!
The 33-year-old is still waiting for the call from a new club after leaving Newcastle at the end of his contract. What a joke!
Wilson's agent, Will Salthouse, has a close relationship with David Sullivan and he has approached the Hammers owner over a possible move for the free agent. What a load of nonsense!
Wilson spent five years at Newcastle, who paid £20million to sign him from Bournemouth in 2020. What a waste of money!
