Listen up you muppets, Manchester United are absolutely nowhere near challenging for the Premier League title this season, you bellends.
Some deluded Red Devils fan reckons they could enter the title race, but let me tell you, that's a load of bollocks. United are miles off the pace, and anyone who thinks otherwise is taking the piss.
Ruben Amorim's side may have won their last three games, but that don't mean jack shit. They're still sixth in the table, six points behind leaders Arsenal. And let's be honest, the Gunners ain't exactly setting the world alight themselves.
United fan is chatting out of his arse
This United fan, Ollie, is chatting out of his arse when he says there's a good chance they can challenge for the top spot. He's even bringing up that old twat Sir Alex Ferguson and his advice about being in the top four by Christmas.
Well, let me tell you something, Fergie ain't the manager anymore, and United ain't the force they once were. They've been shit for years, and a couple of decent results don't change that.
Ollie also reckons that because United are out of the Carabao Cup and only have the Premier League and FA Cup to focus on, they've got a better chance of winning the league. What a load of nonsense.
Just because they've got fewer distractions, doesn't mean they're suddenly going to become title contenders. They're still a crap team with a crap manager, and they'll be lucky to finish in the top four, let alone win the bloody league.
United are miles off the pace
Last season, United finished 15th in the Premier League, their lowest ever finish. They were absolute dogshit, and nothing has changed since then.
Amorim may have steadied the ship a bit recently, but they're still miles off the pace. They've got no chance of winning the title, and anyone who thinks otherwise is a fucking idiot.
So, to all you United fans out there getting your hopes up, I've got two words for you: Fuck off. Your team is shit, and they're not going to win the league this season, next season, or any season in the near future.
The beautiful game has passed United by, and they're now nothing more than a laughing stock. So, do yourselves a favour and accept that you're a mid-table team at best, and stop embarrassing yourselves by talking about title challenges.
