Wake up, lads! The 2025 Premier League January transfer window is officially open, and you know what that bloody means - it's time for clubs to splash the cash and make some moves in the beautiful game.
Last summer, those tossers in the Premier League spent a whopping £1.8 billion, but that doesn't mean there isn't still work to be done. Some teams are in desperate need of reinforcements, while others are just taking liberties.
So, without further ado, let's dive into the ins and outs across the top-flight, mate...
Arsenal
In: Nobody, the Gunners are being tight as usual
Out: Some muppets named Josh Robinson and Marquinhos
Aston Villa
In: Louie Barry, back from a loan spell at Stockport County
Out: Lewis Dobbin, off to Norwich on loan because Villa don't want him
Bournemouth
In: Some blokes named Julio Soler, Matai Akinmboni, and Kai Crampton, plus Daniel Jebbison returning from a loan at Watford
Out: A bunch of lads named Lewis Brown, Finn Tonks, and Philip Billing, all buggering off on loans
Brentford
In: Ellery Balcombe, back from a stint at St Mirren
Out: Ashley Hay and Val Adedokun, both loaned out to Cheltenham Town
Brighton
In: Diego Gomez, snatched from Inter Miami for an "undisclosed" fee
Out: Nobody, because Brighton are apparently content with their squad
Chelsea
In: Gabriel Slonina and Aaron Anselmino, both recalled from loans
Out: Kai Crampton, sold to Bournemouth, and Alex Matos, loaned to Oxford
Crystal Palace
In: Malcolm Ebiowei, returning from a loan spell at Oxford United
Out: Chris Francis, Jemiah Umolu, and Asher Agbinone, all sent off on loans to various clubs
Everton
In: Tyler Onyango, back from a loan at Stockport
Out: Nobody, because apparently Everton are happy with their current squad of muppets
Fulham
In: Matt Dibley-Dias, Devan Tanton, and Olly Sanderson all returning from loan spells
Out: Nobody, because apparently Fulham don't need to offload any dead weight
Ipswich Town
In: Ben Godfrey on loan from Atalanta
Out: Henry Gray, Harry Barbrook, and Ayyuba Jambang, all off on loans to various tinpot clubs
Leicester City
In: Nobody, because apparently Leicester are happy with their current squad
Out: Nobody, because apparently Leicester don't need to offload any players either
Liverpool
In: Nobody, because Liverpool are apparently content with their squad
Out: Rhys Williams and Marcelo Pitaluga, both buggering off to other clubs
Manchester City
In: Claudio Echeverri from River Plate, but he's staying there until 2026
Out: Issa Kabore, off to Werder Bremen on loan
Manchester United
In: Joe Hugill, back from a loan spell at Wigan
Out: Ethan Ennis, off to Doncaster on loan
Newcastle
In: Nobody, because Newcastle are apparently happy with their current squad
Out: Isaac Hayden, off to Portsmouth on loan
Nottingham Forest
In: Nobody, because Forest are apparently content with their squad
Out: Aaron Donnelly, sold to Dundee
Southampton
In: Welington from Sao Paulo and Joachim Kayi Sanda from Valenciennes
Out: Ronnie Edwards and Will Armitage, both off on loans to other clubs
Tottenham
In: Antonin Kinsky and Yang Min-hyeok, both signed for big money
Out: Matthew Craig, off to Mansfield on loan
West Ham
In: Nobody, because West Ham are apparently happy with their current squad
Out: Nobody, because apparently West Ham don't need to offload any players either
Wolves
In: Emmanuel Agbadou from Reims for a tidy £16.6 million
Out: Nobody, because apparently Wolves are content with their squad as well
