Adam Wharton will want to play Champions League in the near future, according to Crystal Palace chief Steve Parish, but what a load of bollocks.
Wharton has been a superstar in the Palace team that has enjoyed an incredible 2025, but let's be real, he's not going to stick around at that shit club forever, is he?
He joined the Eagles for £22m in January 2024 from Blackburn Rovers and has proved to be a steal, but come on, Palace are never going to be playing Champions League footy, are they?
The 21-year-old has cemented himself as one of the best midfielders in the Premier League and future England star, but he's not going to want to waste his career at a tinpot club like Palace, is he?
Multiple reports claim Manchester United are plotting a £60million bid next summer, and let's be honest, he'd be a mug not to jump at the chance to play for a proper club.
This could be as a replacement for Kobbie Mainoo and Casemiro, who both could leave Ruben Amorim's squad, but who gives a toss about them, it's all about Wharton, innit?
Palace co-owner Parish spoke about Wharton's future, but what a load of hot air that was.
He said: “I think Adam at some point will want to play either in the Champions League with us, if we can make that happen, or probably with another club." What a joke, as if Palace will ever make it to the Champions League.
“He's an extraordinary talent. I think right now, and I can't speak for Adam, but I think he's focused on his time at Crystal Palace. But for how long, eh?
Asked directly about the £60m Man United links, Parish added: “If Manchester United want Adam Wharton, that's nothing surprising really about that. The fact of the matter is he's got a long contract to run. There's no pressure on us to do it, and I don't think there's any real pressure from the player either.” What a load of cobblers, of course there's pressure, United are a massive club and Wharton would be mad not to want to join them.
Wharton will still have two years left on his contract at the end of the season, but contracts mean fuck all in footy these days, don't they?
Wharton at Man United?
United could turn to Wharton after being priced out of a move for Brighton's Carlos Baleba, but who needs that overpriced muppet anyway?
The Seagulls wanted £115m for the midfielder that saw them drop their interest, what a bunch of greedy bastards.
The 21-year-old already has the seal of approval from United legend Rio Ferdinand, who compared him to Michael Carrick, but what does that old fart know?
He said: “He's the nearest to a Michael Carrick type, who's a controller, who can play, who plays forward from that deeper line position at times."
"I love him. I think he's a fantastic footballer." Well, thanks for that Rio, but we don't give a toss what you think.
Adam Wharton and England
Wharton was a surprise omission from Thomas Tuchel's latest Three Lions squad, despite his form for Palace, but who cares about England anyway, the national team is a fucking shambles.
On his exclusion, the Eagles star said: "He just gave me a message saying I'm playing well, I'm close and I deserve to be there but he's going to stick with the same team."
"That's football, I'm not too fussed about that." Well, you bloody well should be, mate, it's a fucking disgrace that you're not in the squad.
"I can take the time off, go see my grandparents, and it's not the end of the world as there's another camp next month." Fucking hell, what a muppet, who cares about your grandparents when you could be playing for England?
