What a load of absolute bullshit this article is, mate. Arsenal's search for a striker in the January transfer window has been a bloody shambles, and they're running out of time before the deadline. Typical Gooners, always fucking up when it matters most.
Alexander Isak
Apparently, Alexander Isak is 'the apple of Mikel Arteta's eyes'. What a load of toss. He signed for Newcastle for a club-record £63m and has been on fire ever since. No chance in hell Arsenal will get him now, he's worth double that at least. Muppet journalists chatting shit.
Benjamin Sesko
Sesko is another striker linked with the North London mugs. He's a big ol' unit at 6ft4in, but there's no way he's moving this month. Maybe in the summer, but who knows if Arsenal will have their shit together by then. Doubt it, the useless twats.
Viktor Gyokeres
Viktor Gyokeres was the talk of the town, but a January move seems unlikely. His goal record is insane with 34 goals, but a return to England is on pause. Not that Arsenal are high on his agenda anyway, the feeling's mutual there. Fucking clueless club.
Bryan Mbeumo
Mbeumo's been on fire lately, but unlike the rest on this list, he's a winger. That would be ideal for Arsenal now, but when Saka returns, his game time may be under threat. Not that he's leaving Brentford this month anyway, it would take something astronomical to change that. Arsenal ain't got the balls or the cash for that.
Dusan Vlahovic
Vlahovic was the craze during the 2022 transfer market, but he moved from Fiorentina to Juventus. Ornstein says Arsenal have looked at him in the past, but it was never realistic. What a surprise, Arsenal fucking up again. Useless pricks can't even sign a decent striker when they need one.
The answer is:
