F*cking hell, that Messi geezer's at it again, ain't he? This time he's prancing around with a bloody American football instead of a proper footy ball. What's the world coming to, mate?
Messi's got some nerve, ain't he?
So get this, right, Messi's only gone and starred in some poncy advert for Apple TV, promoting the fact that all MLS games are available on there. Like we give a toss, mate. I'd rather watch paint dry than that MLS shite.
The advert's a load of old bollocks
In this godawful advert, Messi's dribbling an American football like it's a soccer ball. Who does he think he is, hey? He's not even doing it on the pitch, he's doing it on some fancy set. What a mug.
Messi's taking the piss
And then, get this, right, he only goes and kicks the American football through the goalposts, like he's some kind of NFL hero. And then they have the cheek to say, "When football ends, fútbol begins." F*cking liberty, that is.
Messi and his cronies
So Messi, along with Apple TV, MLS, Inter Miami, and some other muppets, launched this campaign as the NFL season ended. Big bloody deal, mate. Like we're supposed to be impressed or something?
Inter Miami's new kit is a joke
In the video, Messi's wearing Inter Miami's new kit. It's this two-toned pink monstrosity they've got the nerve to call "Euforia." Looks like a f*cking Barbie doll's shirt, if you ask me.
Messi's selling shirts like hotcakes
Apparently, Messi's got the top-selling footy shirt for 2023 and 2024. Whoop-de-doo. And he's got the No. 1 spot globally for Adidas in jersey sales. I bet he's well chuffed with himself, the smug git.
MLS ain't all that
So apparently, Messi earned the MLS MVP title after leading Inter Miami to victory with the Supporters' Shield and setting a new league record for the most points in a regular season last year. MLS ain't exactly the Premier League, is it? Load of old cobblers, if you ask me.
Will Messi play in the 2026 World Cup?
At 37, Messi's still banging them in, and he's signed with Inter Miami through the 2025 MLS season. But he ain't said whether he'll represent Argentina in the 2026 World Cup hosted in the United States, Canada, and Mexico. Probably too busy counting his money, the greedy bastard.
